I had reported last week that Krist Novoselic, Nirvana Bassist, was giving up his music career in pursuit of politics. I was enthusiastic about his decision and if he decided to run for the ‘Big Kahuna’ of them all, being the United States President, I’d carry him all the way to Washington on my shoulders even if he threw his bass guitar up over his head in the process. I even thought for a moment that maybe we’d see a trend starting, in Jesse Ventura proportions, where entertainers finally use their powerful presence and take political offices by storm. A few days later this daydream became a nightmare….
Instead of Bob Weir or Trey Anastasio announcing they would run for Governor of Vermont or Colorado a seismic quake of insanity arises in California. ‘The Terminator’, Arnold Schwarzenegger, is running for Governor! Then, to counter the ray gun toting Republican meathead from advancing closer to Sacramento, Gary Coleman, of 70’s TV ‘Different Strokes’ fame, rises like a diminutive phoenix from the California smog to challenge the politically rabid cyborg and announces he’ll fight for the seat in office!
What can we do to counter-attack this insanity? Do Californians REALLY want a ‘Shoot-Em Up’ action figure as Governor? For Christ’s sake you’ve already got the LAPD filling that slot! What will happen when those two forces unite? Gary Coleman? C’mon now! Give me Re-Run or J.J. Walker and then you’d get some asses up and into the balloting booth!
Don’t be fooled, people. This is all just a plot to lull you to sleep again so you’ll forget that ‘GW Gump’ is your elected President. So, take another Zoloft, put on your Britney Spears CD, do what the ‘Good Tube’ says and you’ll be just fine.......
S. Remington – Editor
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